Mall Wars:
JM: Oh! We go shopping in Cheyenne yesterday! I so tired, I have to pass out and go to bed!
AH: Did you have a good time?
JM: Well . . . I tell you something. I found nice suit when shopping. Such nice pink suit. But have so-call shawl collar, so I don’t know. Guess how much cost?
AH: I don’t know.
JM: No. You guess it.
AH: A lot?
JM: Guess!
AH: A trillion dollars.
JM: Don’t be stupid! It cost over $169 dollars. Can you imagine? Who going to pay that much! People such stupid! Guess how much cut to?
AH: I don’t know.
JM: No! You guess!
AH: Um. $19.99?
JM: Oh! You cheater! How you know that? You just make lucky guess. So I thought I going to show your father. See what he think. Price so good. You can’t beat it! So I hide suit behind all different racks. Way, way back. But I notice woman watching me! So I go to find your father. So I have to looking, looking. And you know your father. He never where suppose to be. Guess what happen next?
AH: That woman bought the suit?
JM: Yes! She watch me to figure out where I hid, and then I come back and she was already at cash register. Now I want to kick myself.
AH: I’m sorry.
JM: So I give good advice to you. You want to buy suit or something, don’t let out of your sight. Or somebody else going to snitch it! Is so-call doggy dog world!
Comfort Inn:
JM: I want you make reservation for us right away before everyone else snitch all good rooms!
AH: Okay. You like the Comfort Inn best, right?
JM: Comfort Inn best one! Although Super 8 have icebox! So when I see icebox in room, I thought goody goody! We can keep all kind of food in there! But we like Comfort Inn. Promise you make reservation now
AH: Okay.
JM: I want it on ground floor. Because your father get cranky have to carry all box and suitcase up stairs. Can you tell them I want it ground floor?
AH: Sure.
JM: And we like be close to front desk. We want that room again. That’s room they put us in before. We like that room. Tell them!
AH: Um, okay. I’ll see what I can do about that.
JM: And we want room with window where we can see out to parking lot. That way we can watch car. And make sure nobody snitch it! And we can watch out window and see what you doing. When you come to hotel we can watch behind curtains and see you! And then we see you go to car afterward!
AH: Really?
JM: Yeah, we can all spy and see exactly what kind funny business you up to! Last time you talking on phone to boy when suppose to take me to grocery store! I see it from window! So then I go outside and make cut throat signal to you and you have to hang up!
AH: Great.
JM: And remember your friend? Penni? We see her drop wine! In parking lot! And it broke on concrete! Just fall out of hands and wachhh! We watch from window, so we know all about it! I think she must go to room and cry because drop such expensive bottle of wine. I think, poor so! I tell her I see her drop wine in parking lot at conference the next day and she make such funny face I know how upset she must be.
AH: Or maybe she felt uncomfortable because you were, I don’t know, spying on her?
JM: Hello! What you talking about! You don’t know anything. Promise me you make reservation now, though! Already almost September and conference already end of October. All room going to get snitch if you don’t hurry. I feel so anxious.
AH: I promise.
JM: Don’t forget!
AH: I won’t.
JM: You always forget!
AH: And yet you always have a room. Funny, that.
JM: Don’t be tonkachi head. I have to remind you over and over again. [Sighing.] Now I have to worry about packing car. We better practice to make sure all fit.